When I wrote before about how I deal with life as a disabled domme I left out one important thing: the ability to adapt.

Being able to adapt and adjust to what life throws at me has been perhaps the MOST essential element in my arsenal of tools for survival. It has probably been the thing that makes the difference between merely surviving and actually thriving.

Let me give you some examples. As a kinkster I’m interested in many, many things. A few of the things I’ve been very interested in learning how to do over the years include fire play and needle play.

However one of my disabilities is a movement disorder called essential tremor. When I was younger my hands would shake, just a bit, almost imperceptibly. As I’ve gotten older the disorder has progressed and now they shake quite a lot. Now even my whole arms jerk sometimes. You can imagine that this would make activities like fire play & needle play difficult or even unsafe for someone like me to perform.

So I adapted and adjusted. I turned instead to other kinky interests I held such as erotic hypnosis and brainwashing fetish. And so I’m able to continue expressing my kinky self, finding satisfaction in ways that work for where I am now and the hand life has dealt me.

Another example of this is my energy level. The issues I struggle with now often leave me exhausted and unable to do the kinds of things I used to love such as going out to clubs or events.

I’ve adapted to this by finding more online outlets; places to play like Second Life and various sexting platforms. Even making femdom porn is an outlet for me. When I make a clip I am speaking to my fantasy slave just as much as you are engaging in fantasy with me when you watch or listen to the clip. And outlets like these help me feel like the Goddess inside me is still alive and active even when the fleshly body she inhabits feels worn the fuck out.

So in short I cannot stress enough the importance of adapting and adjusting. When you’re a kinkster with a disability you need to be able to adapt. Whether that means adapting a toy to work for your body or adapting your own behavior and expectations, adaptation can be the key to thriving as a disabled dominant.

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